It's the Most Mindful Time of the Year

 The German's have a single word to describe the feeling of joyful anticipation; Vorfeude. 

With the holiday season upon us many may be experiencing vorfeude. The reality of this time of year is that while many feel joyful anticipation, many do not. In fact, our brains have a natural tendency toward a negative bias. Our brains are programed to fear the worst. 

Statistics show:

85% of American's celebrate Christmas. 

16.9% of children in the US live in poverty

15-17.9% of Michigan children live in poverty

Songs tell us that this is the most wonderful time of the year, and for many of us it can be, but for some it's just another month of the year. 

During the month of December I challenge you to make mindfulness a priority. Studies show that we can help our brains shift focus with mindfulness. Studies also tell us that repetition deepens our desire to do mindfulness and benefit from it's positive effects. 

Use mindfulness to break up long days, long lessons, or provide a much needed calm down time. Use mindfulness to shift focus when you observe difficult moments.

Not all of our students will celebrate a holiday this December. Some will celebrate a holiday different than our own. Mindfulness can help you connect during a time in which students may feel disconnected from others due to having a different celebration, or no celebration at all.

One of my favorite winter time mindfulness activities is Hot Chocolate Breathing. You could even suggest other hot beverages if students don't like hot chocolate. There is always tea, cider, and coffee.

Hot Cup of Mindfulness Breathing

Author Kira Willey has new book out called, Hot Cocoa Calm which you can see and hear on the YouTube link.

It is a cute book for our younger students. 

Once you teach this breathing you could have a hot cocoa day and play this video while practicing the breathing and enjoying some hot chocolate. 

I would also encourage you to take some time to check out Kira Willey's Website to learn more about her books, yoga, and music. If you need some upbeat music to play while students have indoor recess, are cleaning up, or just need a movement break check out her songs on Spotify or YouTube. 

I would also encourage you to take some time to watch Kira's TedTalk called Bite Sized Mindfulness. She shares about how all kids can do mindfulness and how when you make it enjoyable they like it and want to do it. She also shares that no matter the background of a student (or adult) all of us can do mindfulness. She also reminds us that consistency is key. This goes back to our beginning thought about repetition deepening the ability and desire to do mindfulness.

Let's take time this month and as we close out 2022 to put a new focus on mindfulness. Open yourself up to a mindfulness practice and then share it with students. Make this the most mindful time of the year.

Resources to Help Build Skills

 This week I wanted to take some time to share some resources that you may find helpful for yourself and your students.

ADDitude Magazine

This website is dedicated to ADHD education. There are sections for; Professionals (educators), Parents, Adults with ADHD, and even a section for testing. The testing sections is a great little quiz you can review to see if behaviors fall into the ADHD category.

Below is a great poster you can download and print. It helps explain ADHD to teachers. It breaks down what you see and what is going on underneath.

If you take time to explore this site I guarantee you will find something helpful. I found this site through an article on utilizing praise systems for students with ADHD. 

The next resource is a great SEL (social emotional learning) resource. AND ITS FREE. 

Harmony

I have used Harmony over the years for various posters, material, and education ideas for students. This week they shared that they have added some online SEL games. They even have an app you can download. I have explored the online games and they are user friendly and help students with working on emotions and behaviors. There is a game called Battle the Bullybot. It is a game that gives scenarios related to bullying and asks the students what to do or if the right thing was done in a situation. This could be a great way to take brain breaks. Explore the site and try a game. Students can play alone or together.

Don't forget about Inner Explorer. Put this into practice daily and you will have the easiest 5-10 minutes of your day. Our kindergarten teachers tell me their favorite is the 2-Minutes of silent mindfulness lesson. Mrs. Cords states that it is the quietest her class gets. She states that they can do it and they do it well! Give it a try.

For teachers of older students, have you ever wondered about your students' strengths?

The Virtues in Action Survey is a great way to explore this topic. You can take it too. I've completed the survey for classes I've taken and I have loved seeing the results. The VIA talks about your top strengths as well as your bottom. They never say you don't have a quality on the list, just that you lack it more than others, It is presented less in your life. In classes I've had we were challenged to build our bottom strengths by utilizing our top strengths. I have used the VIA to help create daily goal plans for middle school students. The VIA was created with idea that we should look at strengths and not simply criteria for the criteria for mental health diagnoses  (ie the DSM aka a how to for billing insurance companies). 

With cold months ahead you may find you are inside during recess. You can utilize this time to present an option of controlled movement and mindfulness. ALO Yoga is a great site with free lessons. They use mindfulness and yoga to help children. They have some with titles such as; "Post-Lunch Refocus" and "Yoga for Confident Learning". Each session is under 10 minutes and features an adult and children working though the lesson together.

This week I want to leave with this last link. It is a video of high school students explaining how mindfulness has helped them. I love finding videos of students sharing out. We as adults can express the benefits, but when you hear from a student, the impact is different and powerful. The Power of Mindfulness

Circle Back to Better Resolutions

 

I found this graphic this week and thought it made a great follow up to last week.

Last week we talked about utilizing I Statements as a way to expressing feelings regarding a situation, without blaming others. 

When you read through The Grill Back you get blaming. 

When you read through The Circle Back you get accepting responsibility and working toward a resolution. 

As we work to be more mindful at school (and at home) it is good to take a few moments to reflect on how we are walking the mindful path.

Mindfulness teaches us to accept things as they are without judgement. That means accepting students and the fact that the may have behavior struggles. This does not mean accepting the behavior but rather accepting that they may happen. Then we can begin asking ourselves what message the student is conveying with the behavior, what needs they are seeking to have met, and how can you help them circle back.

Even reading the first line of each is a wake up call to how we address unwanted behaviors. Instead of saying "Um can we talk about earlier" just jump in and identify the challenge "Earlier was hard for us, wasn't it?" Let the student know the situation was hard on more then you and more then them. The second statement helps identify the feeling and who it affected (this is a nice little piece of a restorative conversation). 

When we begin to reframe from a feeling perspective we take ownership. This teaches our students how to take ownership too.

Owning feelings, especially the unpleasant ones is not easy for adults and we have a fully formed brain (if you are 25+ years old). We need to take intentional time to teach students this challenging skill.

Conflict resolution is a skill quickly being lost. With more and more students spending more and more time on screens they lose the interpersonal skills needed to work through a situation. For most of our students a resolution to conflict is to shut off a screen. What happens when its a person in front of you and not a screen? Our students struggle. Some adults do too.

Learning to talk with others helps us resolve not avoid conflict. Learning to address a situation from a feelings stand point helps with ownership instead of blaming.

Try some of the phrases from The Circle Back. Think of how you can reframe the way you address concerning behaviors and attitudes. 

How do you talk with your students regarding what you saw and what you want to see from them?

If you find you are using more statements from The Grill Back, follow the advice from The Circle Back and try and take more breaths.

Before you address a student do a quick self check and see if you can identify your feelings without judgment and if you can express them without blaming.

Take a breath together with the student. Lead by example. 

** Do Yourself a Favor and  Call the Number Below**

707-873-7862

It is a school project where kindergartners give you encouragement. It is the cutest. Enjoy!

The Power of "I"

 Feelings happen. 

If you take some time to study the brain and it's behavior, then you will learn that we utilize our emotion center more often than we utilize our logic center.

Our Amygdala, which is part of what is known as our Reptilian Brain, is our emotion center. This is our center for Fight, Flight, Freeze, or Faint. This is part of our sympathetic nervous system. Our fear response. Our safety center. We need this, however, we do not want to simply run on this all of the time. When we run on this we create higher levels of cortisol in our body. Cortisol is our stress hormone. Too much can do significant harm to our body.

We need to learn how to slow down our thinking, switch off the Amygdala and turn on the Prefrontal Cortex. Our Prefrontal Cortex is our wise brain, our logic center.

How do we start this process? Where do we begin?

More often than not when feelings arise we blame others, express them in a big way, or do not address them at all.

We need to learn to identify and express them in a healthy way. We need to lead by example so our students begin to do that same.

If you have never tried to utilize an "I Statement" try it today.

Teaching and utilizing the "I Statement" takes a feeling from blaming to owning. We own the feeling we have and we assert it, not blame it on others. 

I feel frustrated when you choose not to listen to directions because it tells me that you are not focused or ready for the day. I'd like you to take some time to refocus and find a way to help yourself listen better. Maybe you could take a five minute break in the calm down corner.

I statements express a feeling about a situation. They do not shame or blame. 

it's not... 

Why is it you never listen to directions?

Are you even listening to me?

Is there a good reason you aren't listening?

You never listen!

Children (and adults) more often than not will stop listening when a statement is blaming. It is a comment reaction to become defensive, shut down, and not change the behavior.

An I Statement expresses how an action makes someone feel. The feeling belongs to the other person, you cannot tell them it is right or wrong. When you hear a feeling statement you listen from a perspective of understand not defense. 

A mindful way to address a concern is to utilize an I Statement.

I statements give the listener time to use the logic brain not the emotion brain.