Aspect-Shift

 "See a child differently, see a different child."- Dr. Shanker

Have you ever found yourself saying something like the following:

"This student is so lazy."

"This student never tries."

"This student does not listen."

"This student has the worst attitude."

If we are honest, we all have had those thoughts, or similar. We need to learn to do a mind shift. Much like our Most Generous Interpretation of a student's behavior, we need to shift our view of the student.

"This student is so lazy." ->aspect shift-> "This student looks tired, I wonder if they slept well."

"This student never tries." ->aspect shift-> "This student appears to struggle with math, I wonder how we can help."

"This student does not listen." ->aspect shift-> "This student is having a difficult time complying with my requests, I wonder if he is confused and how I can reframe things for better understanding."

"This student has the worst attitude." ->aspect shift-> "This student is struggling to express her emotions and appears overwhelmed by her emotions."

Dr. Shanker shares on his website Self-Reg.Ca and in his practice that we need an aspect shift to see students differently and we will see a different student. 

Our aspect-shift can start with our thinking, our MGI, but it also should include more.

An aspect-shift incorporates our full self.

When we approach a student we struggle to connect with due to behavior or attitude we need to reflect on:

-Facial Expression

-Eye Gaze

-Tone of Voice

-Gestures

-Posture

We need to aspect shift ourselves. How we interact. We need to shift to self-regulation.

Our own self regulation matters. Until a child learns to self regulate they will borrow our regulation. A child will not only notice your self regulation but they will mirror it and share your calm. If you are not calm, a child also share your chaos. 

How you see a child and how you approach and interact with them can change the situation in a split second. 

Regulating a child starts with regulating yourself. Your self-regulation will help you begin to see your student differently, it will help with your aspect shift.

Take some time to think about that one student who seems to always be causing problems in your class. As yourself:

-How do stand when I am by them? Do I tower over or get down to their level? Do I sit with them? Am I standing straight and stiff or am I relaxed and calm?

-How do I hold my hands? Do I hold my arms across my body? Am I using my hands to talk? Are my hands in fists?

-What is the tone of my voice? Calm and even or loud, high-pitched, and fast?

-Where am I looking? Am I so angry (and not remembering q-tip) I avoid eye contact?

-What does my face read? Is it relaxed or tense? How are my eyebrows?

70% of communication is non-verbal. It is not what we say but how we say it and how we look when we say it.  And children are excellent at reading body language. They will unconsciously react to your unspoken interactions with them.

What might that next interaction look like with your challenging student if you; first thought about your non-verbal communication, second you regulated your own emotions, and then lastly saw the student from a different perspective?  

We need to aspect shift to see our students in a different light and use MGI. Aspect shifting starts with ensuring we are regulating ourselves. We can't see a different differently if we are seeing red from our own anger. 

 

We don't have difficult students giving us a hard time. We have good students having a difficult time.